Tag Archive: Ideas


Just dropping lines and thoughts….

 

When I was younger poems were something I loved to read but was no good at writing. I mean yeah I could string the words together and could write but not poems. Poems for me weren’t like story’s, you could lose yourself in a story but a poem? that could transport you to a mystical magical place…. Thats how it was for me. I tried poems, I wrote them to friends, in birthday cards and letters. Everyone I knew said they were great but I didn’t believe so.

I went round to a friends one day when I was 16 and a man was sat in a chair drinking a cup of tea. I didn’t know him didn’t recognise him but he was a friend of the family and my mate Lee’s parents weren’t back yet. It was Lee’s birthday and I gave him his card with another poem in it, Smiling he said to this man that I was good at poems. Handing him the card to read he disappeared and came back a few mins later with every poem, letter and silly story I had ever writ him, I was kinda shocked he kept them. The man sat reading them quietly for ages then said to me and this I will always remember….

“If you write with your heart, like you do here, your writing will always be the best you can give.”

He also said that the best writers are those that aren’t afraid to write about any topic, he was talking to me personally  about poem writers but it applies to all.

I took what he said and remembered it. I try very hard to make sure that every poem I write has feeling, that hopefully, you the reader enjoys it. Good, bad, happy, sad, emotional, anger, despair, depression, love. Sometimes I have to look so deep into myself to find that feeling in order to show it in a poem. No topic is safe. I will write about anything and everything. Every poem I write is not necessarily how I’m feeling that day.

That man? the one who told me that? He’s an author and grew up with Lee’s dad in America. I didn’t realise till about 5 years later when I saw his picture on a dust jacket of the book I was buying. At the time, being 16, and the way I was it was more interesting breaking the law and ignoring adults than listening to what they had to say. Lee and his family went to Australia for a better life when I was 18. I spoke to him a few days ago and he told me he still has those letters and poems and stuff. I laughed and asked why he would keep them? His answer? “When you finally publish something, it’s gonna be great, and, I’m gonna blessed that not only did I know you first but I have my own private collection of the real you.” How cool is that? I was stunned into silence!

My next post will be number 200 on wordpress. I didn’t think I would carry this on but, I found I like not just the writing but more and more, I like the publishing! And it’s so incredibly cool that I get to read the work of so many very talented people! And look at the most amazing photos! You all should be proud! 🙂

So I don’t know what post number 200 is gonna be yet? Maybe I should pick my favorite posts of the other 199? Or maybe just another poem? We’ll see….

Happiest of hugs to you all, I hope the weekend is just fabtastic for you!

.x.

~ Crashing…. ~

 

Today I’m crashing….

My mind emotions feelings thoughts

in free fall,

I couldn’t care less all reasonable thought gone

my happiness disappeared fuck you all,

Today I’m empty

void of thought,

I can’t remember what I’m doing

can’t remember the smile steps I’m taught,

I’m so tired

energy taken from flesh and bone,

Gray swirls around keeps negativity

i feel alone,

I feel so lost

so empty today,

My smile is gone

packed its bags gone away,

Darkness is calling me

smudges the edges of real,

Comprehension is gone

nothing makes me feel,

Today my heads

messed,

I struggle 

to get dressed,

Today I want to run

away,

I don’t want to be me I don’t want to 

stay,

Today I feel a disappointment

i feel hated,

Today I feel so low that even

unloved seems over rated,

Tomorrow I may feel better happier

or just the same,

I can’t guarantee I’m gonna be ok

i’m on depressions board game….

 

.x.

 

 

Hello you!

Hi! How are you? Fab I hope!

I want to ask you all a question!

I like to take a word and write my impression of it ( Have you noticed? ). I’ve 25 of them going back quite a while now. I love words, like how one little word can have such a big meaning or one very long word can mean something small. So in thinking about words, here’s my question….

What is your interpretation of one of or both of the following words?

*Solecism.*

sol·e·cism  (sl-szm, sl-)

n.

1. A nonstandard usage or grammatical construction.
2. A violation of etiquette.
3. An impropriety, mistake, or incongruity.

[Latin soloecismus, from Greek soloikismos, from soloikizein, to speak incorrectly, from soloikos,speaking incorrectly, after Soloi (Soli), an Athenian colony in Cilicia where a dialect regarded as substandard was spoken.]

sole·cist n.
sole·cistic adj.

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2009. Published byHoughton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

*Dislogistic.*

ThesaurusLegend:  Synonyms Related Words Antonyms
Adj. 1. dislogistic – expressing disapproval; “dyslogistic terms like `nitwit’ and `scalawag'”

uncomplimentary – tending to (or intended to) detract or disparage
Based on WordNet 3.0, Farlex clipart collection. © 2003-2012 Princeton University, Farlex Inc.
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.
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I’ve put what the words mean ( just to remind you ).
So written in either a poem or a thought, what is your impression of the above words?
Well, happy hugs to ALL of you.x.x.

~ Attraction…. ~

 

 

There’s something about you

so defiant and wild,

It’s something untamed

an anger so riled,

You shift me to standing

on an uneven plane,

Your intensity leaves me awestruck

and I’m breathless again,

Such dominant eyes

and power exuding stance,

From knees weak to glacial

your eyes change with one glance,

An aura of hunger

deep thinker dangerous and dark,

When it comes to being secretive

your so quick off the mark,

A recklessness I’m drawn to

you take chances leap off the ledge,

Your lightness darkness good and bad

you walk on laws edge….

 

.x.

 

 

~ Need….? ~

 

Not speaking to yous

killing me,

My heart’s aching and 

this storm won’t leave me be,

My soul feels like its been ripped out

been ripped out and torn in two,

Body’s craving a never ending hunger

the only food it needs is you,

My skin consistently crawling

it’s screaming for your touch,

I’m burning a conflagration

your the water I need so much,

And yet still I fight these impulses

still I won’t have you here,

But my whole beings in a blind panic

cuz it only wants you near….

 

.x.

 

 

 

I feel fuckin empty

an empty shattered dream,

Self loathing and self doubt

reality shattered at the seam,

Across the room there is a mirror

pop two pills and step up to,

Slosh them down with whisky neat

drag my joint and step on through,

So barren and so empty

fuck this ain’t wonderland,

Shriveled grey and dark

yup just fuckin grand,

Walkin down a cracked path

sweets dished out by a clown,

Say thanks and then I look at him

his face is upside down,

Up ahead there is a forest

made by brambles bare,

Past that a hill lit from the other side

lightning strikes it there,

In the forest there is a beetle

he blocks the path what can I do,

I start to cry and he bawls

his mouth is how to get through,

Going up the hill the path it gets narrow

an rocks stones they all stick up,

Trip fall slash my leg open

on sharp edge foot stuck in a rut,

Look down expect to see blood

but there’s maggots and there’s slugs,

All this blackness just keeps pouring out

it’s all slimy so many bugs,

I stumble ever onwards

the hill my crest of a wave,

Fall through a trap door but landing softly

at last yes I shout save,

Snake venom in a bottle

drink and try your luck,

I can’t move my limbs

shit I’m so dam stuck,

Gust of wind I 

tumble out a door,

I’m not where I started

but I’ve been here before,

Bugs keep pouring

out my leg,

So many oh so many

cracking out their egg,

Stumbling down my new path

hear a high-pitched shrieking noise,

Turn a corner by a craggy tree

horrific mickey toys,

Eyes sat on his cheeks

nose is pouring red,

Meat cleaver in his four hands

bollocks it I’m dead,

Old freak face mickey

he sings me a song,

Everything spins

this is so wrong,

Open my eyes I’m

sat on the floor,

Whisky bottle upside down

balanced above the door,

The mirrors not there any more

instead a painted fairground,

Where my pills and joints

hold hands and dance around,

I grab the bottle off the table

swallow a handful of pills from once full hand,

Me and my joints I’m no longer empty

in un-wonder-fuckfaced-land….

 

.x.

 

 

Entertaining my children and….

 

…. calling my cousin dowally for hunting dragons! It’s not finished and will be continued, just a lickle bit of fun. Inspired by the….

(Septimus Heap Series) by Angie Sage

When Matthew awoke that morning, he knew today was going to be the most important day of his life. Today he was going to do what all apprentice wizards do after they turn 14…. Today Matthew was going on his quest for a dragon!

Matthew got dressed in his purple robes as fast as he could, he never got tired of examing the intricate gold thread that wove this way and that across the sleeves and hem, and then down the long flowing sides of his heavy cape. He raced down the stairs jumping over the sleeping  owl that was perched on a chair at the bottom, and stood before the great doors to The Masters study.

” You may enter “. Said a loud voice as Matthew took his hand away from the door. Matthew turned the great door handle with two clicks of his fingers, ( a trick Albert had taught him ). As he entered, it never failed to amaze Matthew just how magnificent The Masters study was. Three walls were lined four stories high with every book you could imagine. The fourth wall had three-arched shaped windows facing the north. In the center was a long table and just in front of the windows was the masters huge ebony desk.

The Master stood at his desk watching Matthew walk across the room, he was called The Master by everyone and he was so old now that only the ghosts knew his real name, even The Master had forgotten.  ” Here is your quest”. Said The Master, handing  Matthew an ivory envelope with silver thread.  “I will see you when you return “. “And remember you only have two days to complete your quest”.  The Master smiled at Matthew ” Good luck and may time be on your side “.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

 

Well thats what our new bedtime story is about and thats how far I’ve got. I always add lots of actions ( like a play).  Just that little bit took nearly an hour ( yeah seriously!), and even my eldest 2 stood at the door to listen, this story is being told to a 10, 9, and 6 yr old.

I hope your all having a good morning/day/evening/night where-ever you are at the end of the wire. Hugs ALL.x.

 

In this swirling black vortex

i feel so alone,

I want to call out for you

but I can’t I’m on my own,

I’ve never been this lost

never been so afraid,

When it comes to being strong

i can’t make the grade,

I remember those words

wounds those words healed,

    ….Love is and emotion….

        ……..and emotions get you killed….

.x.

The light through

yonder window streams,

The tortured heart

bursts at its seams,

It slowly flutters

to the floor,

And its not beating

anymore,

Words footstep heel

crush’s its spark,

Until all thats left

is eternal dark,

With time it slowly

fades away,

All thats left is dust

imprinted memories to stay….

.x.

Hi….

Hello everyone! How are you all? I hope life is treating you well and special people make you smile  b         🙂

I haven’t written on here in a while, didn’t want to as I don’t want to fill this page with unhappiness but, its about time I wrote something!

For those of you who have been reading a while now, you will have already read about Taylor (My middle son). Well in good news his blood pressure is down to 121/73 which, is excellent! But bad news, the last set of tests they did, his kidney function is reading what they call abnormal and bad, like his usual kidney function is good? It’s a lot closer to the 40% now and that day is getting so much closer. Taylor is off to hospital next week for more tests. He’s happy he gets to stay off school.  In order to give Taylor an “as normal as possible” childhood, we’ve never really told him just how serious his problems are. Some people might think this is wrong but why make life any harder for him? Doesn’t he have enough to cope with already? He knows he is different and has asked if he is normal? And that IS hard. My eldest (the 13yr old), knows whats wrong and being very close to me, picks my moods up before anyone else, he’s currently sticking to me as I plaster a huge grin on my face. He knows how much I worry about Taylor.

In some good news Taylor has a girlfriend friend that’s a girl, to young to put those words together! It’s nice to see them chat and giggle and laugh together, she constantly gives him the sweetest smiles.  🙂

Taylor is a fan of classical music ( I like so many different types, all the children get to listen to it all). I was thinking about taking him to the theatre to see something. Anyone got any ideas of whats good? I haven’t been in about 10 years.

Now Taylor is in year 6, I have to start thinking about secondary school. With his problems with interacting with others, I’m now unsure which High school to send him to. My eldest boy goes to a business and enterprise academy. My eldest girl goes to a specialist academy for performing arts. And there is a science and languages academy near my daughters school.  Living 3 miles from Lincoln castle and in a city, there are another 8 schools that I could choose from. With my eldest 2 the choice was easy and they go to the right schools for them. Amazing isn’t it? As children we spend our life trying to get away from schools then as parents we want to know everything about them!!

I want to get back into education as well and am looking at open university courses but I’ll tell you more another time.

So in other news in our house? My youngest boy is now playing football for the school. My middle girl is now going to dance lessons. oldest boy now in under 14’s team for his football club. eldest girl gaining confidence and letting go of some of her shyness (yay!). Munchkin (3yrs) can now write her 1st name (Double yay!!), and tell you what each letter is and its sound (triple yay!! ). we’re still working on her surname, she finds W hard! I finally got my new sewing machine, a computerized one and my super old one ( from before I was born) is now gone. Oh and our demon tumble dryer is gone and our new dryer does not have an underwear fetish like the old one!!

So that’s it from our house, for now. I haven’t been writing, no scrap that, I haven’t been finishing any poems that I start so none to upload. Hopefully I’ll finish at least 1 poem soon!

Well if you made it to the end, well done you! Hello? Hellooooo? OI! you! Yes you! Wake up!

Happy hugs to ALL of you. Hey! Remember it’s Friday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hope you ALL have a happy huggable weekend full of special people and thoughts that make you smile.  🙂

Big smiles to you all, me.x.

.x.

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