Well hi!  I’ve been bit quiet lately,so much going on and I’ve not been feeling the words. The kiddos first week back at school was interesting to say the least. They are fab and make me proud with the way they’ve gone straight back at it. The youngest is realising that idont mind her listening to music,it’s the gatcha life in lesson time I draw the line at. She’s been busted twice.
    A lot happened on Friday and although this isn’t going to be a long post, I don’t think it will be anyway, its Friday and what’s happened because of it I’m going to write about…
    Friday afternoon me and the 15 year old had a play tickle fight,loads of laughing and smiling and just fun. But I hurt myself (and yes I’ve found it hilariously funny). I’ve twisted or sprained my knee, well I’ve done something to it! By Saturday it was completely swollen and I couldn’t walk on it, que strapping it up to support it as I cussed and cursed around the kitchen, crawled up the stairs and almost cried crawling back down them, as I went off on one at the washing machine for washing clothes to quickly and the dryer for drying the clothes to quickly. Sunday, Monday, we’re now on Tuesday(20:38 UK time), and I’m still seriously struggling its still swollen, it still hurts, I’m still limping, still can’t completely bend or straighten it. But? Its still funny as fudge!
    Now… the more important bit and the reason I wanted to write and this is incredibly sad. On Friday a girl in my 15 year olds form class committed suicide. Needless to say everyone is still shocked. Sadness doesn’t begin to describe it. One of the popular girls who was kind, sweet, caring and beautiful. The school has offered counselling to all students and to all teachers. The teachers have talked to the pupils as each lesson begins both yesterday and today. I wrote previously that the years 2 of my children are in are exam years, there is so much pressure. And I mean an extreme amount of pressure. Covid has made it so much harder, lessons online is so much harder and our house is lucky that there are enough devices for all 3 youngest to be online doing class work. Everyone is feeling the isolation. For 15 and 17/18(Alevel)Yr olds across the UK? The pressure is immense. A support network is ringing every family to ask how their teenager is, after talking for a few moments I asked if she wanted to talk to the 15yr old who was doing her work near me. I have sat and spoken to my 15 year old a few times about what happened. Her brothers and sisters, us as a family, we stick together and we talk. It is a parents worse nightmare and my heart goes out to her mum.
     My last thought in writing this post is this…
          There are going to be days where you feel so alone. That no one understands,that no one is there for you. You will feel like no one cares and that you’re not worthy of love. There will be days where you can’t see anything other than the bleak greyness that appears to go on forever. There might be times when to not breathe? Seems the better option. When these days happen, when your thoughts are like this? I’m asking you to remember something important…

      You are a candle 🕯
If you went out?
Somebodies path would be in darkness.
You light their path in life
Probably without ever knowing
How bright and well lit
You make their life path.
You are important.
You are not just wanted.
You are needed.
And even if at times
You don’t feel it?
You are loved.x.


So as simple as it sounds?
Please don’t ever forget…
You are a candle 🕯