I feel fuckin empty
an empty shattered dream,
Self loathing and self doubt
reality shattered at the seam,
Across the room there is a mirror
pop two pills and step up to,
Slosh them down with whisky neat
drag my joint and step on through,
So barren and so empty
fuck this ain’t wonderland,
Shriveled grey and dark
yup just fuckin grand,
Walkin down a cracked path
sweets dished out by a clown,
Say thanks and then I look at him
his face is upside down,
Up ahead there is a forest
made by brambles bare,
Past that a hill lit from the other side
lightning strikes it there,
In the forest there is a beetle
he blocks the path what can I do,
I start to cry and he bawls
his mouth is how to get through,
Going up the hill the path it gets narrow
an rocks stones they all stick up,
Trip fall slash my leg open
on sharp edge foot stuck in a rut,
Look down expect to see blood
but there’s maggots and there’s slugs,
All this blackness just keeps pouring out
it’s all slimy so many bugs,
I stumble ever onwards
the hill my crest of a wave,
Fall through a trap door but landing softly
at last yes I shout save,
Snake venom in a bottle
drink and try your luck,
I can’t move my limbs
shit I’m so dam stuck,
Gust of wind I
tumble out a door,
I’m not where I started
but I’ve been here before,
Bugs keep pouring
out my leg,
So many oh so many
cracking out their egg,
Stumbling down my new path
hear a high-pitched shrieking noise,
Turn a corner by a craggy tree
horrific mickey toys,
Eyes sat on his cheeks
nose is pouring red,
Meat cleaver in his four hands
bollocks it I’m dead,
Old freak face mickey
he sings me a song,
Everything spins
this is so wrong,
Open my eyes I’m
sat on the floor,
Whisky bottle upside down
balanced above the door,
The mirrors not there any more
instead a painted fairground,
Where my pills and joints
hold hands and dance around,
I grab the bottle off the table
swallow a handful of pills from once full hand,
Me and my joints I’m no longer empty
in un-wonder-fuckfaced-land….
.x.
What can I say…. this poem thingy should come with a warning….
Ok now, I don’t pop pills, smoke joints or even smoke anymore ( and only drink occaisionally).
Going back and reading this I’m either secretly mental or I really do have a good if rather twisted imagination!! 🙂
Consider it a character piece…many of my older writings contain feelings and activities long since retired. Loved it.
Activities long since retired? Hmmm? are these older writings published to W.P.? am off to have a look! Seriously though thank you, I was iffy about publishing this one to W.P. so to have someone write that they like it instead of just hit the like button means a lot to me.
Don’t have a clue what our time difference is but have a fab day rest of today/tomorrow.
Hugs you and family.x.
🙂