~ Anger, confusion, hurt…. The list goes on…. ~
Forget?
can’t forget the pain the hurt the alone,
Always on the outside looking in
I’m on my own,
Can’t forget the look on their faces
like I owe them a favour,
Cuz yeah they pulled me from the gutter
their my saviour….
I don’t think so….
Pushed from pillar to post in the care system
they say they know what’s best for you,
They got your life on paper oh yeah they know it all don’t they
and everything on paper is true,
Like fuck they know it all….
The look in his eyes as he touched you
the smile on his face,
Your mother she hates you
smacking you all over the place,
Your taken away
you lay on a bed in a room,
it’s cold surgical metallic
and frightening gloom,
The years they pass
clinical social workers counsellors psychiatrists,
Therapists psychologists
how many more ists,
You learn how to fake it
make it all good and real,
Fantastic mask upon the world
never show them how you feel,
Gang raped and beaten and then there’s the drugs
your teachers ask why you mutter,
Your lower than low
no place for you in the gutter,
Smile sweetly at your teacher
say you’ve got work to do,
You know you can do this
your strong you’ll pull through,
Life goes on….
Drugs robberies shop lifting
your lower than low,
doped up off your face again
and yet your still on the go,
At a party your best mate dies
a batch of bad e’s,
Your life it explodes come to your senses
your mind finally frees,
You get a job work your arse off
kick most drugs rise above,
And then most amazing
you fall in love,
He says “me or drink and drugs”
and so you choose him,
But it still all ain’t plain sailing
the ice is still to thin,
Years go past you have a family
but you ain’t dealt with your past,
How d’ you keep on going
will it forever last?
Time to be honest with me….?
Deep inside
there is a room,
It’s sitting
in the gloom,
That frightened 6yr old
alone,
Never gonna belong
in that room on her own,
Every time she’s reached out
she’s been hurt,
Every time she’s believed
she’s been treated like dirt,
Heart been so broken
that now its like ice,
The real her so low
much lower than lice,
So afraid of getting hurt
no one can ever stay,
Abused all of my trust so I will
push you away….
.x.
….Help is always there and people always care…. I glimpse you sometimes, the real you shining from with in….. Don’t ever feel afraid alone. You are not a sin….
.x.x.
The swift he flies 
An empty space.... 
